Published in March 20th, 2006
Element Name: MAN
Symbol: XY
Atomic Weight: (180 +/- 50)
Physical properties: Solid at room temperature, but gets bent out of shape easily. Fairly dense and sometimes flaky. Difficult to find a pure sample. Due to rust, aging samples are unable to conduct electricity as easily as young samples.
Chemical properties: Attempts to bond with WO any chance it [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
A couple is doing yard work and the wife goes to take a shower. Her husband is looking for a rake and can”t find it. He yells up to his wife, but she motions to him from the window like she can”t hear. So he points to his eye, hits his knee, and then makes [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
One night, a father passed by his son’s room and heard his son praying: “God bless Mommy, Daddy, and Grandma. Ta ta, Grandpa.”The father didn’t quite know what this meant, but was glad his son was praying. The next morning, they found Grandpa dead on the floor of a heart attack. The father reassured himself [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
Three girls are sitting around, totally bored so one girl suggests that they make up nicknames for their ideal boyfriends and name them after soda pops.”I want mine to be 7-Up, ’cause 7 days a week he’s up.”
“I want mine to be Mountain Dew ’cause when he’s in between my mountains, we’ll be doing it.”
“Mine’s [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
What do men and stockings have in common?
They either run, cling, or don’t fit in the crotch!
Similar JokesFishing for a WeekA man phones home from the office and tells his wife, “Something has just come up. I have the chance…Going FishingA man phones home from his office and tells his wife: “Something has just come [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
A guy goes over to his friend’s house and knocks on the door and his friend’s wife answers. “Is John home?” he asks.
“No, I’m sorry,” she says. “He’s gone out to run a few errands.”
“Would you mind if I came in and waited for a few minutes?” the guy asks.
So John’s wife, who’s wearing a [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
The other day, my friends and I went to this Ladies Night Club. One of the girls wanted to impress us, so she pulled out a $10 bill. The dancer came over to us, and my friend licked the $10 and stuck it on his butt.Not to be outdone, my other friend pulled out a [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. The salesgirl notices him and asks if she can help him.He answers that he looking for a box of tampons for his wife. She directs down the correct aisle. A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls on [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
Two friends, Bob and John were discussing sex before marriage.John: I didn’t sleep with my wife before we were married, did you?
Bob: I’m not sure. Remind me — what was your wife’s maiden name?
Similar JokesMarriage quotes 09Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are [...]
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Published in March 20th, 2006
Once upon a time there lived a woman in Brampton who had a maddening passion for baked beans. She loved them, but unfortunately they always gave her a very embarrassing, and somewhat lively reaction. When it became apparent that she and her boyfriend would marry she thought to herself, ”He is such a sweet and [...]
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