A person receives a telegram informing him about his mother-in-law’s death. It also enquires whether she should be buried or burnt.
He replies, “Don’t take chances. Burn the body and bury the ashes.”
Similar JokesDon’t take any chancesA person receives a telegram informing him about his mother-in-law’s death. It also enquires whether…Business one-liners 72If you have something [...]

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A young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just a little pebble on a vast beach.
The marriage counselor, trying to be creative, told him, “If you wish to save your marriage, you’d better be a little boulder.”
Similar JokesA way to save your marriageA young husband with an inferiority complex insisted he was just [...]

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There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn’t find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, “Great, so now you’re cheating on me with a bald woman!”
The next night, when she didn’t smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, “She’s not only bald, [...]

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The following conversation took place one morning between a wife and her husband. They were discussing government cost cuts that they recently heard about in the paper.
“Steve,” his wife said, while reading the newspaper, “it looks like our government is going to cut overhead and trim down the military forces. They are going to eliminate [...]

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Smaller or larger tuxedo
A friend got married and I, being the best man, decided a humorous practical joke was in order. One of the duties of the best man is to make arrangements for the pick up and return of the groom’s tuxedo.
After final fitting, rent an extra coat jacket that is either three or [...]

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What Exactly Is Marriage?
“Marriage is when you get to keep your girl and don’t have to give her back to her parents” -Eric, six years old
“When somebody’s been dating for a while, the boy might propose to the girl. He says to her, ‘I’ll take you for a whole life, or at least until we [...]

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Old Farmer Johnson was dying. The family was standing around his bed. With a low voice he sad to his wife: “When I’m dead I want you to marry farmer Jones.”
Wife: “No, I can’t marry anyone after you.”
Johnson: “But I want you to.”
Wife: “But why?”
Johnson: “Jones once cheated me in a horse deal!”
Similar JokesMarriage quotes [...]

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A recent survey done by marriage experts shows that the most common form of marriage proposal these days consists of the words: “You’re what?!?”
Similar JokesMarriage quotes 09Marriage is like a mousetrap. Those on the outside are trying to get in. Those on the inside are try…Marriage quotes 08Many a wife thinks her husband is the [...]

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Jack was living in Arizona during a heat wave when the following took place.
“It’s just too hot to wear clothes today,” complained Jack as he stepped out of the shower. “Honey, what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn like this?”
“Probably that I married you for your money.”
Similar JokesWhat will [...]

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In olden times, it is reported that sacrifices were made at the altar.
Since then, weddings have been held there, and times haven’t changed at all!
Similar JokesHow have times changed?In olden times, it is reported that sacrifices were made at the altar.

Since then, weddings have …A doctor is complaining to a mechanicA doctor is talking to [...]

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