An econometrician and an astrologer are arguing about their subjects.
The astrologer says, “Astrology is more scientific. My predictions come out
right half the time. Yours can’t even reach that proportion”.
The econometrician replies, “That’s because of external shocks. Stars don’t
have those”.
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A woman hears from her doctor that she has only half a year to live.
The doctor advises her to marry an economist and to live in South Dakota.
The woman asks: will this cure my illness?
The doctor replies: No, but the half year will seem pretty long.
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“Two policemen are considering the problem of catching the bandit. One of them
starts to calculate the optimal mixed strategy for the chase. The other
policeman protests.
‘While we’re doodling,’ he points out, ‘he is making his getaway.’
‘Relax,’ says the game-theorist policeman. ‘He’s got to figure it out too,
don’t he?’”
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Two government economists were returning home from a field meeting. As with
all government travelers, they were assigned the cheapest seats on the plane so
they each were occupying the center seat on opposite sides of the aisle.
They continued their discussion of the knotty problem that had been the
subject of their meeting through takeoff and meal service [...]

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Bill and Boris are taking a break from a long summit. Boris says to Bill,
“Bill, you know, I have a big problem. I don’t know what to do about it. I have
a hundred bodyguards and one of them is a traitor. I don’t know which one.”
“Not a big deal Boris, I’m stuck with a hundred [...]

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Economics is ruining your life when…
- I tried to calculate my 3 year old son’s discount rate by seeing how many
sweets he would require to be promised to him after dinner to be equivalent to
one sweet before dinner
- I spent one hour in a toy shop making up over 20 bundles of toys that could
be [...]

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4. You raise my interest rate thirty basis points without a corresponding
dropoff in consumer enthusiasm.
3. Let’s raise housing starts together.
2. You stoke the animal spirits of my market.
1. Despite your decade of inflation, I still love you.
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If you do some acrobatics
with a little mathematics
it will take you far along.
If your idea’s not defensible
don’t make it comprehensible
or folks will find you out,
and your work will draw attention
if you only fail to mention
what the whole thing is about.
Your must talk of GNP
and of elasticity
of rates of substitution
and undeterminate solution
and oligonopopsony.
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A party of economists was climbing in the Alps . After several hours they
became hopelessly lost. One of them studied the map for some time, turning it up
and down, sighting on distant landmarks, consulting his compass, and finally the
sun.
Finally he said, ‘ OK see that big mountain over there?’
‘Yes’, answered the others eagerly.
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Q: What’s the difference between mathematics and economics?
A: Mathematics is incomprehensible; economics just doesn’t make any sense.
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The [...]

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